For a year and a half before coming to Kona, I knew that God was calling me to this beautiful place. Reading articles that mentioned Kona or University of the Nations in the YWAMer magazine, or on websites, or even advertisements about this place would cause tears to well up in my eyes.
In fact, in April 2005 when the Operation:John team decided that Kona should be our operations location, I knew it to be true already – to me, there wasn’t even a question!
Then, for the past year and a half or more, I have been telling people that I would likely be moving to Kona, then that I was planning to move to Kona, then that I was for sure moving to Kona. And then I finally did it! It actually happened – God came through! When I first arrived to Kona earlier this month, I was flying high. I was so eager to get to Kona and to move on to my next mission that, in the worst weather of the winter, I braved the back roads (Highways were closed) because I wouldn’t turn back!
Now that I’ve been U of N Kona staff for three weeks, I find myself feeling the same old frustrations I used to feel in Monterrey, even though the people and environment here are totally different! I have never questioned whether or not I should be here… my long-ago tears sealed Kona in my heart. I know I have come home. And yet… I’m fighting the flesh still and again.
How could that be?
Without giving you the trite response one would usually give in this situation, that we are all human beings that fall short of the glory of God and struggle with our sin natures, here’s my personal reality check:
Life is a constant learning process (PBPWMGNFWMY*).
I retain the same personality God originally gave me (some things will always annoy me).
My soul’s enemy will try to convince me that everyone else is to blame for my unhappiness.
My response to irritating or adverse circumstances is my responsibility alone.
Relationships don’t grow or improve through accusations and huffy remarks.
Humility does cause growth and improvement in relationships (not an easy solution).
…(you get the picture)
So, to keep me humble, to maintain healthy relationships, and to win this particular battle against my enemy, I have some apologies to ask.
*Please Be Patient With Me God’s Not Finished With Me Yet
Friday, February 24, 2006
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
MuSiNgS... Shower Confessional
My shower knows me better than anyone. If my shower walls could talk, oh the tales they’d tell of my secrets—secret loves, undisclosed grudges, passionate moments of worship, physical imperfections, and the unknown reasons why I take such long showers!
There’s something undeniably exhilarating about being naked behind a curtain, alone in a room with running water to muffle your clamorous thoughts, especially if no one else is home. You can simply be! No pressure to perform, no one to impress. Whispered prayers don’t garner you curious looks from your housemates. You can dance giddily and gleefully, although not always noisily.
The various showers in the places I have called home have seen a side of me that no human has. They have been my prayer closets, my dance floors, my sanctuaries, and my staid confessionals. I have lived some of my weakest and some of my strongest moments behind shower curtains.
A familiar worship song says, “In the secret, in the quiet place, in the stillness, you are there. In the secret, in the quiet hour I wait, only for you, for I want to know you more.” When I am living in the middle of a city, with no way to get to a “quiet place”, the shower is my substitute. It is my secret place.
Do you have a secret place? Do you have a secret that should really go beyond your shower? Have you ever lingered under the hot water for a few moments to revel in God’s engaging presence (no, doesn’t hide from our nudity)? Would you be brave enough to seek God in a secret place others may deem “irreverent”?
Don’t forget, however, that one goes into a quiet place to get rejuvenated before heading back out to face “real” life with fresh vision! Then there’s also the hot water bill to consider…
Summary
If my shower walls could talk, oh the tales they’d tell of my secrets—secret loves, undisclosed grudges, passionate moments of worship, physical imperfections, and the unknown reasons why I take such long showers!
I have lived some of my weakest and some of my strongest moments behind shower curtains.
It is my secret place.
Do you have a secret place?
There’s something undeniably exhilarating about being naked behind a curtain, alone in a room with running water to muffle your clamorous thoughts, especially if no one else is home. You can simply be! No pressure to perform, no one to impress. Whispered prayers don’t garner you curious looks from your housemates. You can dance giddily and gleefully, although not always noisily.
The various showers in the places I have called home have seen a side of me that no human has. They have been my prayer closets, my dance floors, my sanctuaries, and my staid confessionals. I have lived some of my weakest and some of my strongest moments behind shower curtains.
A familiar worship song says, “In the secret, in the quiet place, in the stillness, you are there. In the secret, in the quiet hour I wait, only for you, for I want to know you more.” When I am living in the middle of a city, with no way to get to a “quiet place”, the shower is my substitute. It is my secret place.
Do you have a secret place? Do you have a secret that should really go beyond your shower? Have you ever lingered under the hot water for a few moments to revel in God’s engaging presence (no, doesn’t hide from our nudity)? Would you be brave enough to seek God in a secret place others may deem “irreverent”?
Don’t forget, however, that one goes into a quiet place to get rejuvenated before heading back out to face “real” life with fresh vision! Then there’s also the hot water bill to consider…
Summary
If my shower walls could talk, oh the tales they’d tell of my secrets—secret loves, undisclosed grudges, passionate moments of worship, physical imperfections, and the unknown reasons why I take such long showers!
I have lived some of my weakest and some of my strongest moments behind shower curtains.
It is my secret place.
Do you have a secret place?
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
MuSiNgS... The Voice of Adventure
Last night, after a busy day, I got home to my dorm, sat down, and opened Max Lucado’s devotional book, Grace For The Moment and read the day’s excerpt, titled “Voice of Adventure”. I’d like to share it with you:
God isn’t safe! But he’s good! He’s not a librarian—he’s a lion! I believe that God offers us chances to trust him even when things don’t appear safe, and that’s when we become part of something life-changing, something world-changing.
This message stood out to me because I sometimes feel that there are people in my life who either admire me for what I do while cowering behind their own circumstances, or question my motives so that they won’t have to feel guilty about their own choices, as Max Lucado says.
There are many things that I fear in the world, things similar to what you fear. But I would encourage you to trust God enough to step out from your comfort zone into something unknown and possibly “unsafe”. Go on a missions trip to a third-world country! Invite your weird neighbour over and show them God’s loving hospitality. Offer to babysit the children of the “screaming mother” two houses down.
Oh the harvest you will reap when you sow in God’s love and faithfulness instead of your own! Can you hear the voice of adventure? Can you hear it? Answer it this time!
The Voice of Adventure
Those who try to keep their lives
will lose them. But those who give up
their lives will save them.
Luke 17:33
There is a rawness and a wonder to life. Pursue it. Hunt for it. Sell out to get it. Don’t listen to the whines of those who have settled for a second-rate life and want you to do the same so they won’t feel guilty. Your goal is not to live long; it’s to live.
Jesus says the options are clear. On one side there is the voice of safety. You can build a fire in the hearth, stay inside, and stay warm and dry and safe…
Or you can hear the voice of adventure—God’s adventure. Instead of building a fire in your hearth, build a fire in your heart. Follow God’s impulses. Adopt the child. Move overseas. Run for office. Make a difference. Sure it isn’t safe, but what is?
He Still Moves Stones
God isn’t safe! But he’s good! He’s not a librarian—he’s a lion! I believe that God offers us chances to trust him even when things don’t appear safe, and that’s when we become part of something life-changing, something world-changing.
This message stood out to me because I sometimes feel that there are people in my life who either admire me for what I do while cowering behind their own circumstances, or question my motives so that they won’t have to feel guilty about their own choices, as Max Lucado says.
There are many things that I fear in the world, things similar to what you fear. But I would encourage you to trust God enough to step out from your comfort zone into something unknown and possibly “unsafe”. Go on a missions trip to a third-world country! Invite your weird neighbour over and show them God’s loving hospitality. Offer to babysit the children of the “screaming mother” two houses down.
Oh the harvest you will reap when you sow in God’s love and faithfulness instead of your own! Can you hear the voice of adventure? Can you hear it? Answer it this time!
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